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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25252729">The Malcontent Lieutenant</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Konbini/pseuds/Konbini'>Konbini</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Monk (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Adrian Whump, Bottom Adrian Monk, Jealousy, M/M, Swearing, Threats of Rape/Non-Con, Top Randy Disher, by the kidnappers, some violence</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 05:41:34</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>5,739</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25252729</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Konbini/pseuds/Konbini</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Randy resents the hell out of Monk. It comes to a head in a way he doesn't expect. They get kidnapped.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Randy Disher/Adrian Monk</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>28</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Set somewhere around Seasons 3-5.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>The ugly feeling - when it comes - is all encompassing.</p><p>It burns all the way through his body.</p><p>They're at a crime scene, the Captain is laughing and clasping Monk on the shoulder, Natalie is cooing like Monk is some sort of hero and Randy has screwed up. Again.</p><p>Is a laughing stock. Again.</p><p>Monk's eyes are crinkled sweetly at the corner, he's holding himself in that shy, meek way he does when he's embarrassed, shoulders hunched in, a smile on his face. Shamelessly soaking in everyone's good will.</p><p>Captain Stottlemeyer catches him glaring and gives him an unimpressed look.</p><p>Randy's fingernails cut crescents into his palm from squeezing so hard.</p><p>
  <em>Clown? You're the whole circus.</em>
</p><p>"No man is the <em>whole</em> circus." Monk had said in Randy's defense, eyes downcast in embarrassment.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>It never used to be this way. With all the coddling and cooing. No - how it used to be was Captain Stottlemeyer's disdain on his sleeve and his bitter laughter whenever someone mentioned, 'The Defective Detective'. Randy had heard the moniker before he'd even met the man.</p><p>The psychological discharge hadn't been amiable, exactly. At least not later on. And - there was something else that Randy couldn't put his finger on. Some reason the Captain's eyes skittered from the man.</p><p>It was more apparent when they started working together once again. How the Captain began to - for lack of a better word - <em>moon</em>.</p><p>Randy can't help but resent the freely doled out praise when he's been begging for scraps.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>It's not even like Monk is that great.</p><p>Aside from his detective work.</p><p>He's extremely difficult.</p><p>Irritating, even.</p><p>Trying.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Randy is fit. He's tall, he has bright blue eyes, clear skin (now). He's fairly sharply dressed. He has his own place, good teeth, he drapes his jacket over his dates. It isn't that he doesn't pull women, it's just that they always leave.</p><p>He's a Lieutenant, and a decently young one. His rate of closure on normal cases is through the roof.</p><p>He can play guitar, was the lead singer of a band, is pretty current.</p><p>He has a lot going for him.</p><p>And every time Adrian Monk is in the room it feels like he's the world's biggest loser.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>Monk</em> has literally nothing going for him.</p><p>Aside from his Detective work.</p><p>He's not attractive.</p><p>Nails meet -</p><p>chalkboard.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>The thing Randy really hates - that really makes his skin itch and his ire rise - is Monk's sweet, little boy act. Like innocence of that nature is at all attractive in a man his age.</p><p>And how quickly he's cossetted. Usually.</p><p>But not always.</p><p>When Sharona was his assistant, despite her steadfast belief in him, she'd always been a tough love practitioner.</p><p>Randy misses her. Wishes he'd appreciated her sooner.</p><p>Sometimes though, it's the Captain who loses his patience. Or other people do.</p><p>Sometimes Monk is manhandled. Verbally abused. Hit - a few notable times.</p><p>His big buttery brown eyes go wide, and tear up.</p><p>It's shouldn't feel <em>so</em> satisfying but it does.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>It's not like Randy ever does anything directly<em> to</em> Monk.</p><p>But maybe it's asking a little much that the World's Greatest Detective doesn't pick up on Randy's loathing.</p><p>Only - it blindsides Randy.</p><p>Because Monk has called Randy a friend before. And maybe it was said a little unsure. Maybe it seemed a little like he'd said it only because of the thin veneer of their expected camaraderie.</p><p>Still.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>It happens like this :</p><p>The Captain is away and Randy is in charge. He calls in Monk because the murder is high profile. Monk shows up without Natalie - she's dropped him off because Julie needs her at school.</p><p>It's just the two of them.</p><p>It rarely is.</p><p>Still, it's not the first time.</p><p>They rarely speak on personal matters in the first place, so Randy is confident they can muddle their way through without too much trouble.</p><p>Monk does his thing. Waves his hands around, straightens self consciously when Randy rolls his eyes.</p><p>"Randy, these chips are from mahjong. Probably an illegal gambling parlor from the looks of these markings. This isn't a home set."</p><p>Randy calls it in and gets a location from dispatch that has several offenses against it for illegal gambling of this specific sort.</p><p>"The killer probably won't be there." Monk scoffs when Randy suggests it.</p><p>Randy feels stupid, and that more than anything makes him stick to his guns - although he sends his back up home because he doesn't want them to see him fail.</p><p>"Ness." Randy stops an officer on his way in, who looks surprised to see him, "Make sure they call me after they wrap the scene."</p><p>"I thought you were off today - " Ness says, a little uncharacteristically pale.</p><p>"Don't I wish." Randy looks at Monk as he says it, means it with his whole being, and he doesn't really care that Monk looks back at the bitter words and sees him staring at him.</p><p>"Monk and I are just going to do a routine check."</p><p>"Ah, well. I can take him if you want." Ness offers, which Randy wishes he could take him up on.</p><p>"Routine Check?" Monk asks worriedly, "I should probably stay, Natalie is going to pick me up."</p><p>"I'll drive you home." Randy says, notices the way Monk hesitates, and glowers.</p><p>"Okay." Monk relents.</p><p>Randy puts in a brief call to Natalie - who seems somewhat overjoyed to have the rest of the day off. Not that Randy blames her.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>It <em>was</em> a routine check.</p><p>That's all Randy has to say in his defense even as he's aware it's his fault. Leading a civilian consultant to somewhere dangerous.</p><p>The gambling parlor is empty save three men acting on the orders of Dale 'The Whale' Biederbeck. Randy doesn't know that of course - it's Monk who points it out. There's a tall, skinny man with brown hair. A shorter, gruff one without any. And the last one is a good looking man with black hair in Randy's age range with a devious glint in his eye. He's the kind of guy who's always the ex of the ladies that Randy dates who look up at him in awe and tell him what a great guy he is. Only because the last guy had been an abusive piece of shit. Randy wishes he recognized any of them but he draws a blank.</p><p>They're outgunned and Randy says as much. Unhappily puts his gun on the table for the men at Monk's request.</p><p>"Look, what do you want?" Randy asks.</p><p>"I think he wants your friend to suffer." Chuckles the short, gruff one.</p><p>And yeah - Randy doesn't like Monk, but it's not like he'd actively participate in this and it's not like he'd <em>let</em> it happen.</p><p>Monk stands unsure, hands half raised in surrender, trembling. The black haired one seems amused.</p><p>"You don't want to do this." Monk says tightly before the tall, thin man pistol whips him violently.</p><p>Randy doesn't see it coming. Is frozen as it happens.</p><p>"Hey!" He calls belatedly, faintly horrified at the blood blossoming near Monk's temple.</p><p>They leave then and lock the door behind him.</p><p>It's just him and Monk.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>"Look, maybe I should clean that up for you." Randy finally offers.</p><p>It's been half an hour already and Monk is still trying to get all the blood off of him. It actually hadn't been a lot but the thought that there might be even a speck of it left on him seemed to haunt him.</p><p>"You don't have to pretend to care." Monk says airily.</p><p>"I'm not pretending." Randy snaps.</p><p>Monk gives him a look then.</p><p>It kind of makes Randy feel ashamed of himself somehow. But really - the cut on Monk's forehead that disappears into his hair line is mostly superficial. Had looked more serious than it turned out to be. He has a little bump and bruise there too but that's all.</p><p>"The Captain would like if I - " Randy begins to argue before Monk cuts him off.</p><p>He waves as airily as he speaks, not even looking at Randy.</p><p>"I'll tell the Captain you did a good job."</p><p>It's at that moment that the men come back. Short Gruffy - as Randy has taken to calling him - pushes Randy face first against the wall and cuffs him before letting him go. They cover his and Monk's heads, separate them and move them by way of van.</p><p>It's beyond not good. People may have possibly found them at the first location. Randy feels hope of an easy escape or easy discovery dwindle.</p><p>They arrive somewhere else shortly and are moved again.</p><p>For a fleeting moment Randy is terrified. Terrified that they've separated them. Then Monk clumsily falls against him and it fades.</p><p>They take the covers off. They're somewhere industrial. A small control like room. IT maybe.</p><p>Short Gruffy stands guard of Randy, still handcuffed. The tall one - Lanky, Randy decides - takes action while the black-haired one supervises. He's obviously in charge here. Ringleader, Randy decides.</p><p>It isn't difficult to make Monk whimper - Randy knows that - but still it's gut wrenching to hear. Lanky gives Monk a black eye - left side right below the thin cut caused by the original pistol whipping.</p><p>"Listen - " Monk pleads before he's soundly backhanded by a gleeful and unhinged Ringleader. Randy winces.</p><p>It's not even five minutes before it's over and they're gone. Door locked behind them in the windowless room.</p><p>Randy has the distinct feeling this is going to happen in intervals.</p><p>"They were waiting for us. For you." Randy says and Monk nods.</p><p>He doesn't look at Randy. He almost seems embarrassed somehow as he dips uncharacteristically to sit on the ground. Maybe they've hit him harder than Randy thought.</p><p>"We walked right into his trap." Monk finally mutters.</p><p>It occurs to Randy that Biederbeck planned it this way. He wanted Monk to be without the Captain, without Natalie. Randy inwardly scoffs before cursing - of course he's the weakest link, isn't he?</p><p>"Are you...okay?" Randy asks when Monk is silent for a while.</p><p>Monk is never silent this long.</p><p>There's blood speckling his collar, his deep brown eyes glance up - left one rapidly swelling - as he picks himself up off the floor. Randy feels his mouth go dry.</p><p>"Fine." He says dryly, suffering threading baldly through his tone.</p><p>It's not whining, it's not annoying, it's not pouty. Somehow it doesn't sit right with Randy.</p><p>Monk straightens his collar with a pained noise, resettles his shoulders and situates himself across the room.</p><p>"If I can get these cuffs off - " Randy begins before Monk cuts him off.</p><p>"He has no less than twenty men outside that door."</p><p>That knocks the wind out of Randy's sails. He wonders how he could have missed that. How Monk knows. Either way he's not foolish enough to doubt it. The odds become even more stacked against them and Randy feels himself on the edge of panic. He can't though - his pride won't let him. Monk has dibs and even he isn't completely freaking out.</p><p>Yet.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p> </p><p>The next time the men come Randy still doesn't do much. He's handcuffed. Besides Monk's the target, and it's not like they're irreparably damaging him. Monk wants to get his badge back. He should be able to handle it.</p><p>It still isn't exactly...easy to watch. All they've done so far is wind him - punch him in the stomach - and already Monk is doubled over and wheezing. Is begging them to stop.</p><p>"Oh come on now sweetie," Ringleader taunts while Lanky slaps Monk's cheek - which results in a full body flinch, "You're not gonna tap out that quick are you?"</p><p>Sweetie. Randy files it away in the back of his mind. It's a worrying development. It's most likely just a run of the mill emasculation with nothing behind it, but on the off chance it's not...</p><p>Randy also can't help but notice how Ringleader soaks up every little bit of reaction he's able to get out of Monk. Monk's always been excessively emotive. Randy wishes he could tell him to stop, that he's making it worse for himself. The longer he entertains Ringleader the longer it will go on.</p><p>"Look, just<em> tell</em> Dale - " Monk impresses only to be soundly thrashed.</p><p>He bites his own tongue when he's hit and blood drools out of his mouth. Lanky kicks his legs out from beneath him and Ringleader sighs happily in approval. Randy almost stands to attention because that's too much. Short, Gruffy isn't really paying much attention to guarding him. But even if Randy rushed him they couldn't take them all. It's only economical to wait.</p><p>Still, it looks bad. Randy standing in the corner untouched while they're - more or less - going to town on Monk.</p><p>The Captain is not going to like this, that's for sure. Natalie is going to be pissed.</p><p>The men leave and Ringleader gives Monk a backward glance - drinks in his shiver - complete with smirk.</p><p>Randy tries to be objective and looks over Monk - how pale he is, how stark the bruises and blood stand out, how big and deep his fine brown eyes are, how pink his lips, the clever curve of his eyebrows, the submissive slant of his gaze - and really hopes that it isn't what his gut is telling him. If it is, they're in big trouble.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Monk worries at his cuffs, he worries at his collar, at his jacket. Then, finally, at his eye - both of which are leaking tears. There's even snot. And hurt little sobs that make Randy's heart hitch.</p><p>Monk sees Randy staring.</p><p>"You must be enjoying this." Monk says, miserly.</p><p>His voice cracks a little on the words.</p><p>"I - " Randy begins to defend himself, before failing. He swallows thickly, "I don't know what you mean."</p><p>"Sure you don't." Monk sobs in something like disappointment.</p><p>"I'm not the enemy Monk."</p><p>"...I...I know." Monk admits quietly, then, "You just never liked me."</p><p>There's silence for a moment. Randy wants to refute it but he can't.</p><p>"Look - can you - can you...do me a favor?" Monk asks pathetically.</p><p>"What?" Randy says.</p><p>"Can you make them even?"</p><p>"What?" Randy asks.</p><p>"My eyes. You just have to -"</p><p>"You're asking me to hit you." Randy enunciates slowly with something like disgust, "You think I would?"</p><p>Monk shrugs.</p><p>"It would be a favor."</p><p>"That's not happening." Randy says just as the door opens.</p><p>At the same time Monk wheedles, "Please?"</p><p>A slave to his compulsions. It's not that Randy didn't know but it hits him fresh and makes him feel worse about the 'Defective Detective' moniker.</p><p>"Oh I do love the sound of begging." Ringleader says, eyes twinkling, "And the sight of tear tracks."</p><p>Monk steals himself and Randy is already regretting the words that are going to come out of Monk's mouth. Randy knows he can't help himself. <em>Still.</em></p><p>"It's not symmetrical." Monk says with something like shame.</p><p>Strangely, Ringleader seems to catch on immediately. </p><p>"Your eyes, you mean?" He asks with false wide eyed curiosity.</p><p>Monk nods after a moment of trying not to.</p><p>"Would you like me to fix that?" He asks.</p><p>Randy wants to close his eyes at the response he knows is forthcoming but can't manage it. Instead his eyes are glued to Monk's face, watching him pale. Surprisingly though Monk says nothing. He swallows thickly, and says nothing and it's a miracle. </p><p>"Do you know what Biederbeck paid us to do?" Ringleader gloats without waiting for a response, "He wants us to make it so you can never work again. Dealer's choice. No death but well - everything else goes."</p><p>At the mention of no death Monk in congruently freezes up. Randy can't puzzle out why.</p><p>"<em>Everything</em>." The man intones, stepping close up to Monk and watching him cringe back, "<em>Else</em>."</p><p>It's then that Randy knows they're in trouble. Even if Monk doesn't seem to realize the flavor of it yet.</p><p>"Let him go." Monk says, nodding at Randy, "He's not part of this."</p><p>Randy feels strangely touched at the attempt - although it's obvious it's not going to happen.</p><p>Ringleader cocks his fist back and gives Monk's other eye a square punch.</p><p>"What do you say?" Ringleader quizzes, grabbing Monk's hair and pulling back to expose his neck.</p><p>"Thank you." Monk says politely, quiet and weak.</p><p>The sad fact of it is - Randy thinks - that Monk actually is thankful.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Monk seems a little disoriented and for obvious reasons, Randy is getting really worried.</p><p>"Hey buddy." Randy channels the Captain, "Come here for a second. I need to check if you have a concussion."</p><p>He doesn't think it through - he doesn't have a flashlight. Not that it matters anyway because Monk just shrugs him off.</p><p>He's looking poorly. Pale and waxy. The sluggish leftover blood at his temple has dried but Randy can still see the blood in his mouth. His eyes thankfully don't look that swollen but there's bruises forming - and not just on Monk's face.</p><p>Randy feels...bad.</p><p>He feels, strangely, like he's just kicked a puppy even though he didn't even <em>do</em> anything. He bristles at the impulse, reminds himself of all the reasons Monk annoys him. Only it feels petty in this context. Being slighted is nothing compared to...well the whole situation is bringing something protective out in him and he feels more than a little frustrated that it's being thwarted by Monk himself.</p><p>"Monk....there's something we should talk about." Randy says, loathe to continue even as he knows he has to, "You really need to get these cuffs off me. That way we can loosen them so I can get out if there's an emergency."</p><p>That gets Monk's attention.</p><p>"Well...alright."</p><p>Monk produces a wire he found that Randy hadn't even noticed him picking up. It's a clumsy five minutes where Monk tries not to touch him while simultaneously picking the lock. Randy talks, worried that he won't get the chance before the men come back.</p><p>"Did you notice that he called you Sweetie?" Randy asks, which is a poor start.</p><p>"I haven't lost my faculty of memory yet." Monk says defensively, after a pause.</p><p>He doesn't recognize what Randy is getting at. Of course he wouldn't.</p><p>"He likes to watch your reactions." Randy bites out.</p><p>"That's what Dale paid him for - to hurt me."</p><p>"Monk - I'm trying to tell you something and - Fuck'sake can you please stop avoiding my hands, I'm sure yours are dirty by now too."</p><p>"But I - but I don't have a wipe." Monk sounds scandalized at Randy's suggestion, or maybe his words.</p><p>If Monk's around Randy does not swear. Hell, if Monk is around then conversation in the damned precinct becomes as squeaky clean as conversation in the church pews. Somehow it just feels wrong to swear around Monk.</p><p>Randy is frustrated when he pulls away and turns to look at Monk.</p><p>"You need to be careful. He is enjoying your reactions, so minimize them -"</p><p>"I can't."</p><p>"You can." Randy strong-arms through the whining as if he were the Captain, "and you will. Otherwise he is going to escalate...." Randy really didn't want to say the next part, but he couldn't leave it out in good conscience, "and it may be sexually."</p><p>Monk wilfully ignores him. </p><p>"Monk!" Randy hisses, "I'm telling you for your own good."</p><p>"Are you sure you didn't hit your head?" Monk asks instead, frowning and squirrelly - looking anywhere but Randy.</p><p>He's embarrassed, Randy realizes. Randy feels his heart clench and a warmth blossom there. The deflection is trussed up in something like a scoff - as if Monk intended for Randy to become defensive like he usually does. But that's different, and so Randy doesn't.</p><p>"Monk-" Randy tries again.</p><p>"<em>I'll be careful</em>." Monk whispers heatedly.</p><p>It's obvious he wants Randy to drop it so Randy drops it.</p><p>Monk tugs a little at Randy's cuffs some more but then gives up.</p><p>"The wire broke. There's no way we can get these off of you."</p><p>Randy groans in frustration.</p><p>"Well," he begins, trying to cheer up a despondent Monk, "They'll miss me at the crime scene when they wrap. They'll find us, I know they will."</p><p>But of course, he doesn't really know they will at all.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I'm sorry this was so slow to update!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Thankfully - or not, depending on how one looks at it - they do not leave them alone that long. A couple hours at most although it feels <em>much</em> longer.</p><p>God forbid Randy needs to piss. But his throat is parched, and he's hungry. Monk must be too.</p><p>Mostly him and Monk have been sitting in awkward silence - Randy watching the developing bruises on Monk's face. He feels horrible about it. And even more horrible that Monk needed them to be even. It touches something inside of him, is all he's saying. Monk is sad and pathetic, like a puppy. Which is odd, given that it's usually Randy himself other cops compare to an over-eager Labrador.</p><p>"Are you sure there was that many of them out there?" Randy finally asks, more because he's sick of the silence than any other reason.</p><p>"Yes." Monk answers miserably.</p><p>"What if they weren't part of his crew? What if they were factory workers or something?"</p><p>Twenty extra men is a lot after all. It's not that Randy doubts Biederbeck could afford that many - but why would they need that many to get a job done?</p><p>"Even if we escaped, factory workers who saw them bring in two men with hoods over their heads wouldn't help us. They're probably too scared. Or maybe they want them to hurt us."</p><p>Monk has a point, although the last part is said glumly - laden with self pity. Randy almost rolls his eyes before he realizes if there is any situation in which one should be allowed a little self pity - it's this.</p><p>"Then what can we do?" Randy asks.</p><p>"Nothing." Monk says.</p><p>"Come on<em> think</em>." Randy whines, because he knows Monk has a miracle tucked away somewhere in that brain of his.</p><p>Monk always comes through.</p><p>It's a little unfair though - to expect that. Especially given the dire circumstances they are in. Besides which, the words don't look like they are actually helping. All they seem to be doing is stressing Monk out. He's got that fussy, unhappy look on his face that usually makes Randy smug.</p><p>"Look, I'm sorry." Randy begins, "I shouldn't have said that."</p><p>The words cause Monk to get up and step in a little distressed square.</p><p>"I-I wouldn't be like this if I could stop myself but I <em>can't</em> stop myself. I'm useless. It's just like you said. I'm defective. I can't do anything right. I don't know what Trudy saw in me."</p><p>The words sit uncomfortably in the room. It's...uncomfortable for Randy to be confronted with his own thoughts and his own words. It's not like he'd known that Monk believed them or he would never have allowed them to be overheard. Probably would never had said them.</p><p>Randy sighs loudly.</p><p>"No Monk...you're perfect." It's probably said with such defeat that Monk actually looks at Randy with concern. "You can probably tell me a hundred different things about just this room. You could probably triangulate our position from the wind. Or build a bomb out of the kitchen cupboard."</p><p>Monk is silent for a moment.</p><p>"That doesn't mean anything." Monk says finally, "not really. I could barely stop myself from asking him to hit me again. Trudy wouldn't have - "</p><p>Monk cuts off abruptly, looks like he's about to cry.</p><p>"No," Randy chokes out, "that part of you is perfect too."</p><p>Before Randy says it - he doesn't know he's going to say it. Doesn't acknowledge it - even to himself.</p><p>After he says it, it's all he can see.</p><p>God, is he really that transparent?</p><p>Has that really been what this all was about?</p><p>"I'm the fuck up." Randy says quietly.</p><p>Of course it's then that the men re-enter.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Randy has no doubt that the few hours they were gone were for the men to refresh themselves - to let their captives fray at the edges.</p><p>Monk can't meet Ringleader's eyes. But he searches Randy's eyes shakily.</p><p>"Did you miss me?" Ringleader taunts, playing every inch the bad guy as he leans over Monk - who shies away dramatically.</p><p>Ringleader doesn't like that. He wrenches Monk closer by his lapel.</p><p>"You're sweet, you know that?" Ringleader asks, "Just like Biederbeck said. Fun to play with. I can not wait to tell him what a good time you and I had."</p><p>Ringleader isn't being subtle about it - no, this time he is going after what he wants. Short Gruffy and Lanky shift uncomfortably and Randy wonders what they've signed up for. Not this apparently. Ringleader pushes the coat off Monk's shoulder just as Monk makes a desperate, scared type noise deep in his throat.</p><p>"Don't fucking touch him." Randy bites, didn't mean to. He's supposed to be biding his time.</p><p>"I'm gonna." Ringleader raises an eyebrow at Randy in amusement.</p><p>"Over my dead body." Randy spits.</p><p>"Okay." But before the man can get his gun Monk is there, hands up in submission, soothing the gun back down.</p><p>"I'll do whatever you want." Monk says seriously, "Please don't hurt him."</p><p>The only thing missing is Monk fluttering his eyelashes honestly.</p><p>"<em>Sweet</em>." Ringleader says again, such a look in his eyes when he looks at Monk that Randy wants to smack it off of him. He grasps Monk's chin. "Epp. Go down and get supplies. A sweet boy like this deserves to be treated gently."</p><p>It takes Randy a moment to connect the name Epp with the Lanky and only because he lurches forward uncomfortably. Lanky - <em>Epp</em> - and Short Gruff look at each other. Ringleader leans more heavily into Monk.</p><p>"I think you should give me a kiss, don't you? A kiss for your gallant hero, making you comfortable."</p><p>Predictably Monk tries to wiggle away at the words, turns his head even thought Ringleader thankfully doesn't seem set on making him.</p><p>"I don't know where you keep your fucking lube." Epp finally says in a bitten off tone.</p><p>Ringleader rolls his eyes, slowly retracts himself and leaves the room with the door open. They hear his steps as they fade away.</p><p>"Are you sure this is what Dale wanted?" Epp asks Short Gruff and prods when a response isn't forthcoming, "<em>Ness</em>."</p><p>"cousins" Monk whispers softly under his breath.</p><p>The man's reaction confirms it.</p><p>"Don't use my fucking name!" The man hisses at Epp.</p><p>All four of them are agitated, it occurs to Randy that no one wants what is going to be happening to happen. He'd beg, if he thought it'd make a difference. Randy looks and Monk is already staring at him.</p><p>"why did you offer - " Randy's voice goes funny and high at the end.</p><p>"When they said no death, they meant no death <em>for me</em>." Monk says calmly.</p><p>"This is a fucking mess." Epp says to Ness, "The cop was supposed to be dead before he even learned our names. Doesn't matter though. Monk won't be able to tattle, no less talk, by the end of it all."</p><p>"You're gonna...watch?" Monk asks the men in distaste, frowning in a way that makes even Randy feel like a pervert.</p><p>Randy's not leaving Monk. He's probably gonna get shot and die trying to stop what's going to happen but he's not leaving.</p><p>"Fuck that." Epp says, just as Ringleader returns.</p><p>"I'm going for a cigarette." Ness echoes and stalks from the room, Epp behind him.</p><p>Randy is handcuffed, and Ringleader has a gun trained on him. As amazing as Monk is Randy knows that he can't depend on him for any help here. He's already shaking.</p><p>"Please don't let him see." Monk pleads, eyes locked with Ringleaders.</p><p>Very briefly Randy feels rage because does Monk actually think he'll leave? That he'll just let this happen?</p><p>It's when Ringleader responds that Randy starts to get an inkling.</p><p>"You don't want him to see, huh? Should have kept that to yourself. It's just as easy to shoot him after as it is to shoot him before. Now get your clothes off."</p><p>Monk's done two things - preserved Randy's life a little longer, and made sure that Ringleader's focus is split.</p><p>Thank God it's anticlimactic. When Ringleader swoops in to 'help' Monk with his belt, Monk shoves him. The gun goes off but Randy's out of the way by then, disarms Ringleader in a few seconds flat.</p><p>From there everything else is easy. Ringleader has a cell phone in his pocket so Randy decides to re-secure the door just as a rush of footsteps come towards them.</p><p>Then it's a swat team and arrests and it makes maybe two hours but there's so much going on that it feels like it's minutes. He and Monk don't really get a chance to exchange a lot of words. Ringleader has more than enough words for the both of them in the interim.</p><p>Besides feeling like minutes it also feels like the longest day ever. Like another life time. When they're finally led outside, Randy takes Monk by the elbow and steers him toward the ambulance. Then Randy goes off on his own some distance away to have a moment to himself.</p><p>He finds he's afraid of what Monk is going to say. Randy is, more or less, a total embarrassment.</p><p>Natalie shows up wide eyed and pale first.</p><p>For the first time Randy notices that Natalie comes up and squeezes his arm on sight before her eyes cast around for Monk.</p><p>"He probably needs me." She says apologetically when she spots him, beginning to pull away only before changing her mind and pulling Randy into a hug.</p><p>"Oh you're poor eyes!" Randy hears her exclaim when she's some distance behind him.</p><p>Then there's the Captain, all nervous and distraught.</p><p>"Is he okay? Are you okay?" The Captain says, deflates when Randy nods in the affirmative.</p><p>"Monk's not - he's not strictly okay." Randy says, "Oh and Ness is -"</p><p>The Captain's gaze goes hard.</p><p>"Ness is already in custody." He says, "Thank God you were with Monk-"</p><p>"I screwed up." Randy cuts in, "Monk's not really okay. You'll....you'll see. I...failed him."</p><p>"Randy I don't know what happened, but you're a good cop. I know you did your best. And they knew you would too or they wouldn't have tried to get him at a time when he was all alone. I don't want to think about what would happen if you hadn't of picked up that shift."</p><p>The Captain claps Randy on the back and usually that would be enough praise to make Randy happy - not today. It should be edifying that they had planned for Randy to be gone too when they abducted Monk but Randy still can't find it in himself to be pleased.</p><p>"Captain, the Ringleader..." Randy can't go on.</p><p>Monk's delicate. How much will something like this effect him?</p><p>The Captain does see Monk then, his bruised face. Randy can see the Captain swallow thickly, can watch him pale.</p><p>"He's alive, Randy. You both are."</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Randy doesn't see Monk again until about a week afterward. He's still healing up. Ugly bruises turning yellow. He looks good though. When he and Natalie come into the precinct they're smiling. Randy can see Monk has flowers through the window before they're about to come into the floor.</p><p>Natalie comes in, comes up to his desk.</p><p>"He wants to see you outside." She points airily, somewhat amused.</p><p>Randy doesn't know how to act now. He feels nervous when he meets Monk in the hall.</p><p>"Monk." He greets.</p><p>Monk, for his part, looks just as embarrassed as Randy feels.His eyes keep flitting about, barely meeting Randy's.</p><p>"I wanted to thank you." He says and thrusts the flowers forward ungainly.</p><p>"For what?" Randy can't help the smallest bit of despair from leaking into his tone.</p><p>"You saved us." Monk says plainly, which makes Randy feel...horrible. </p><p>"I didn't though."</p><p>"We wouldn't have made it if you didn't do everything right. You did everything right."</p><p>"And what does that mean?" Randy asks bleakly.</p><p>Monk sits heavily on the bench, smile fading.</p><p>"It wasn't a good plan. I wasn't sure it would work. I've never done anything like...<em>that</em> before. And I...I couldn't tell you what I was thinking. The room was bugged, they were listening to us."</p><p>Randy sits down heavily beside Monk at that information. It's his own fault for not knowing - he's stayed away from any mention of this case all week. Typed up his statement and sent it in. He hadn't even wanted to learn the Ringleader's name.</p><p>"Oh."</p><p>"The whole thing of course hinged on you staying and...as long as I could get Epp and Ness out of the room. I knew you'd understand then. You could have left me behind but you didn't."</p><p>"I'd never." Randy says abruptly, with strong conviction.</p><p>"Well I knew that." Monk says with some embarrassment, "Even if you didn't like me I knew you were too good."</p><p>"I'm not good." Randy says unhappily.</p><p>"You're a good cop and a good person. I know I...sometimes I make a big deal out of my consulting because it's the only good thing about me and -"</p><p>"It's not the only good thing about you." Randy says, frustrated.</p><p>To his surprise Monk blushes, mouth snapping shut.</p><p>The flowers in his hands suddenly seem conspicuous.</p><p>"A lot of the time..." Monk begins again, unsteadily, "I envy you. "</p><p>Huh. Randy doesn't know what to make out of that.</p><p>"It used to really bother me that you didn't like me." Monk continues, "Because I knew even if I wanted to change I couldn't."</p><p>"I <em>do</em> like you." Randy says. "I just...envied you."</p><p>At that miserable declaration Randy stands up, but Monk tugs him back down and presses his lips to his. It's electric, Randy feels it through his whole body even if it's only a split second. He freezes, doesn't even have the wherewithal to check if anyone has seen them.</p><p>"For my g-gallant hero." Monk says stiffly, then all but flees.</p><p>Natalie must see him fly by because she comes into the hall a moment later and runs down the hall in her heels.</p><p>Randy straightens abruptly from where he'd been frozen.</p><p>The Captain comes into the hall and gives Randy a dubious once over.</p><p>"What are you grinning at?"</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p>
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